Today I just feel like being really fucking stupid.
So that’s what I’m going to do!
Welcome one, welcome all to the third Jags Chats! *crowd goes wild* Wooooooo!
Anyway, I was just thinking, how FUCKING COOL would it be to go to Hogwarts? I’ll be honest, I’ve fantasized about this a lot just because WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. HOW DID J..K ROWLING DO IT? HOGWARTS IS FUCKING AMAZING. I said fuck way to many times in that I’m sorry. But seriously, I desperately want to go to Hogwarts.
I want to go to Diagon Alley with all my wizard/witch friends and we can meet Ollivander and get freaking cool wands and be like EXPELLIARMUS BITCH. And then I want to go to Hogwarts on the Hogwarts Express and buy chocolate frogs and then go and get sorted with the Sorting Hat.
I feel like everyone just wants to be in Gryffindor though because Harry Potter and Hermione and Ron were in it. But the other houses are pretty good too. I actually think, despite their stereotype, that Hufflepuffs are really nice and secretly they’re super bad ass and they like steal food from the kitchens or something. I like how I think that stealing food is super bad ass. That really shows something about my personality.
And then Ravenclaws seem really witty and confident and they just give zero shits. Like if someone said holy crap look, a werewolf! They’d be like get out of the way bitch, let me handle this.
Slytherins don’t really get much credit for their work either though. I think that there was like a big group of Slytherins who went bad then everyone went bat shit crazy and was like OH NO I DON’T WANT TO BE IN SLYTHERIN CAUSE THEN I’LL BE CURSED AND DIE AND THEN MY SPIRIT WILL BE TORTURED BY A CRAZY SERPENT BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED TO BOB MCGEE SO IT’S DEFINITELY GONNA HAPPEN TO ME. Half of them probably aren’t that bad aside from like Malfoy and all those idiots.
If your a nerd, like me, you’ve probably been on Pottermore and done all those quizzes. I’ve done them multiple times on like 5 different accounts but I forget what I get every time I do them so, for the purpose of this post and definitely not for my own amusement, I will do those quizzes and we can find out together what my wand and my house would be!
Okay, let’s do this.
My Hogwarts house:
Question 1: Forest or river?
Ugh this is hard because I love them both. Is the river in the forest? Or is it just in the middle of a field? I’ll go with forest, they’re just so pretty!
Question 2: Which of the following do you find most difficult to deal with? Hunger, cold, loneliness, boredom, being ignored.
Oh I can’t deal with being ignored. I have some friends that do that and I’m like HELLO I’M A PERSON TOO.
Question 3: Given the choice, would you rather invent a potion that would guarantee you: Love, glory, wisdom, power?
Well I wouldn’t really want to fake love or glory and I’m not really about that power so probably wisdom.
Question 4: You and two friends need to cross a bridge guarded by a river troll who insists on fighting one of you before he will let all of you pass. Do you: Attempt to confuse the troll into letting all three of you pass without fighting, suggest drawing lots to decide which of you will fight, suggest that all three of you should fight (without telling the troll), volunteer to fight?
I’m a lover, not a fighter so I wouldn’t volunteer. And I love my friends too much to draw lots. I also would be too scared to fight him, even if it was all three of us so I would try confuse the troll cause, c’mon they’re pretty stupid anyway.
Question 5: If you were attending Hogwarts, which pet would you choose to take with you? Tabby cat, Siamese cat, ginger cat, black cat, white cat, tawny owl, screech owl, brown owl, snowy owl, barn owl, common toad, natterjack toad, dragon toad, harlequin toad, three toed tree toad.
Okay first of all, toads are freaking gross. Owls are nice and they look cool but CATS. They’re just so cute! I wouldn’t want a tabby, white or black. Ginger cats are super cute but I love the Siamese cats! Their eyes are just amazing. So yeah Siamese.
Question 6: What kind of instrument most pleases your ear? Violin, trumpet, piano, drum.
I used to play piano and I love the sound of it. Violin can be nice sometimes but it’s a bit weird sometimes. Trumpets all right and the drums are okay too but not great. Definitely piano.
Question 7: If you could have any power, which would you choose? The power to read minds, the power to be invisible, the power to have superhuman strength, the power to speak to animals, the power to change the past, the power to change your appearance at will.
I wouldn’t really want superhuman strength. I wouldn’t mind speaking to animals like that would be rally cool but I think it would get annoying after a while. Then changing the past would be great but I also think you wouldn’t really develop as a person and you might accidentally stuff up the universe. But being able to change your appearance would be great cause you could literally do anything. Like you could rob a bank and turn into a table, you could hide from people by turning into like a fly or something. It would just be amazing.
Question 8: Left or right?
Right. Just cause I’m right handed.
And the results are……..
I’M A RAVENCLAW! WOOO!
Okay so there are two quizzes to go but this post is kinda long and it’s all about Harry Potter (whoops) but I will definitely do a part two because this was fun.
You should all go onto Pottermore and do the quizzes and let me know what house you’re in! Perhaps you’ll be a Ravenclaw like me and we can bond over whatever Ravenclaws bond over.
Have a lovely day/night/afternoon/morning!