Weird Things I Do When I’m Alone

I just figured out that I am fucking weird when I’m alone. Just then I was putting a movie on and while I was doing that I literally out of nowhere just shouted ‘YOU KNOW WHO I LOVE? FUCKING CHRIS PRATT’ then laughed hysterically and continued on with what I was doing. And when I’m alone in the house I love to just talk to myself about random shit. Shit that doesn’t even doesn’t even make sense and if someone were to walk into the room while I was doing they would think I was bat shit crazy. If I talked like that to everyone I think I would be in a mental asylum already.

And as I’m talking to myself I sometimes slowly merge into a different accent. Sometimes it’s really strong Australian. Sometimes it’s posh English. Sometimes it’s Irish. Sometimes it’s Texan.

When I’m going to go do something, like get food or go to the bathroom, I always announce it as if someone was awaiting my every move. A few days ago I was alone again and needed to take a shit so I stood and shouted ‘I’M GOING TO TAKE A VERY LARGE DUMP’ in an extremely posh accent.

I also tend to sing really really badly and make up different words for songs. And then I recite those songs about 400 times as I dance like an absolute crazy person.

Now, you may be thinking, okay you’re a crazy woman. And my answer to you is yes. Yes I am. And I’m proud of it.

Is there anything weird you do on your own?

Jags xx

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